we never know.

Recently, I’ve been aware of people in my area who died unexpectedly the past 2 weeks.

A local doctor was killed in a car accident.

A fellow classmate died unexpectedly.

And yesterday, a couple in their 70’s were driving down a street I am sure they have driven for years and were hit by a car. The wife died.

We never know.

If you have a word-of-faith type of theology, you may feel insulated from tragedy. On one hand, you know it’s inevitable, but at the same time, you live in a bubble of it not coming near to you.

It will.

I used to be what was called an intercessor…a “prayer warrior”.  But it didn’t save my son.

Do I still believe in prayer? Yes. But now I know what prayer really is: nevertheless, not my will, but yours be done. It’s allowing God to do what he wants with me, even if it means I have to endure suffering. Because in the pain, God is with us, helping us, and even gives us joy.

We should never live in fear of what may happen to us or someone we love. But if we trust God as he asks us, there is solid ground to walk on, even when you feel like you’re sinking.




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in memory of children gone too soon.

Please join us this Sunday, December 14 for the Worldwide Candle Lighting in memory of all children gone too soon.

For full information including services around the globe, visit: the compassionate friends. If there is not a service near you, or you would rather not attend a service, just light a candle for an hour wherever you are with friends, family, or in quiet solitude.


scripture friday.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart;

do not depend on your own understanding.

Seek his will in all you do,

and he will guide your path.

- The Bible



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how not to be bitter.

I have had reasons to be bitter. In fact, every so often, I can feel bitterness trying to sneak up on me. Let’s face it – there are plenty of good reasons why we can get bitter. Life can be very unfair.

So how can you resist, avoid, and rid yourself of bitterness?

Trust. If you are familiar with the Bible, there are scriptures about forgiving, turning the other cheek, and going the extra mile. I wasn’t able to do these things well until I decided to do what God asks us to do: trust Him with all our heart. It has made all the difference. God says there will be a day when he makes things right and he will wipe away our tears once and for all. This settles it for me. It helps me to accept what I cannot change.

Acknowledge. I’ve hurt people. I’ve said things and done things I shouldn’t have. Bitterness will have a hard time finding a place in you when you admit to your own faults.

Nothing is new under the sun. What you have faced, others have faced, too. That doesn’t make it hurt less, but it opens our eyes to the bigger picture. Bitterness makes us spend too much time looking at the smaller picture and keeping us miserable.

Be free.




Photo credit: h.koppdelaney / Foter / CC BY-ND


Sometimes our pain can make us bitter.

Our hearts become infected because of wounds inflicted (or perceived to be inflicted) by others.

While it is understandable, it must be prevented because it’s only going to hurt you. It is a strong, negative emotion.

How do you know you’re bitter?

  • Seeing or even just hearing the person’s name who has offended you makes you seethe inside. Ever feel it? I have.
  • You replay the tape. Over and over and over.
  • If you find out something good has happened to that person, it aggravates you.

Bitterness eats away at you.

Next time, “how to stop being bitter”.



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friday quote.

Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.

- Corrie ten Boom



Photo credit: photoloni / Foter / CC BY


Originally posted on when it hurts:

Where am I going?

I am baffled.

I was headed there. I was certain of it.


But when it happened, everything changed.

And now I am here.

It’s cold. Everything looks dismal. This is not where I want to be.

Then I looked up. I saw the light. It is the one thing that is constant. It’s always there. Even when I cannot see it.

And it will guide me.


Photo courtesy: h.koppdelaney / Foter / CC BY-ND

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