Archive | September 2012


You may have tried to do everything right. But despite your hard work, you are gripped with despair, disappointment, and discouragement.

Everything can change tomorrow.

Brick walls are penetrable.


Jesus said, “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food to eat or enough clothes to wear. For life is more than food, and your body more than clothing. Look at the ravens. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for God feeds them. And you are far more valuable to him than any birds! Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? And if worry can’t accomplish a little thing like that, what’s the use of worrying over bigger things?

-The Bible


Each year, the memory fades like the colors of summer’s end. Not of him, but the day I felt the suffocation upon learning of my son’s death.

Books, support groups, and counselors may tell you to celebrate your lost loved one in some special way. Everybody has a well meaning tip.

Yet, many of us manage a smile, nod our heads in gratitude, and feel our hearts being squeezed as the lump comes into our throats. We walk away feeling alone and empty, asking ourselves why we allow ourselves to be in these situations.

When one realizes that only God knows the depth of your sorrow and pain, a silent relationship is built between you and the Creator of the Universe, who holds all things in his hands. And you know, you just know, that your loved one is safe in God’s arms.

Some who do not believe in God think this is some kind of fairy tale thinking. It’s not. Because if it were not for God, the pain would be too much and we would want to die.

I have no fancy tips to celebrate your loved one. In fact, silence from a friend is the best. Just sit with me.

Animals will go in hiding when they are in pain. People do, too. Sometimes, the noise is just too much.

Triggers will come –  a scent, a sound, or the way the sun is shining on a particular day. Feel the momentary pain and it will subside. If you smile, then smile. If you cry, then cry.

But then, move on and enjoy with purpose the life you have – and the hope of being reunited with your loved one.


This morning, I read to my 11 yr. old about the tundra.

Most of the tundra is located north of the Arctic Circle – in the Frigid Zone – the coldest regions of the earth.

As winter approaches, the nights grow longer and colder as snow and ice cover the earth. The ground freezes solid.

Desolate. Barren. Empty.

Pain is like that.

But then-

Who knew this far removed region of the earth would dance with color? About 400 wildflower species announces to the world that desolation is only temporary.

The existence of pain does not mean God isn’t real. We accept winter and spring. One does not negate the other.

The arrival of spring brings comfort and tells us that God is with us.

Read nature! It helps explain life.


Photo credits: Rich Reid and Norbert Rosing


No one knows the burden of a mother’s heart … except another mother.

You smile when you’re heart is heavy. Why? Because you don’t want your child – whether young or old – to know you’re hurting. We just can’t seem to venture beyond protection mode. It’s just the way it is.

I can’t comprehend (really, I can’t) how a mother can live her life without God being her strength. Because just as the joys run deep, so do the sorrows. And with some things, no one can hold her up but God.

Maybe your child has a chronic or terminal illness. Maybe your teenager is involved with drugs and/or drinking. Maybe your adult child is having marital problems or going through a painful divorce. Maybe your child died.

Sorrow may be carried with strength and dignity when God calls upon a mother. Yet, He doesn’t leave her to fend for herself, but carries the burden. It would crush her if she were to bear it alone.

You just have to look in God’s direction.

He will call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble.

-The Bible