father’s day.

father’s day.

Maybe you’ve seen it today.

Pictures of fathers and their kids and what-my-dad-always-told-me quotes displayed across social media and television.

Dads embracing daughters. Daughters embracing dads. Dads who would rescue his girl from any potential threat.

Dads fishing with sons. Sons with dads at baseball games. Dads who take the time to make men out of boys.

They’re out there.

Maybe just not for you.

Absent fathers, distant fathers, angry fathers, unloving fathers, alcoholic fathers, emotional and physical pain inflicting fathers …

In my first year of life, my birth father did not want to see me. My potential step-father did not want me. After 2 tries my 3rd father adopted me.

Needless to say, it affected me more than I realized. I have always been optimistic, adaptable, and trusting. I had never given it a second thought. I did not jump on the blame-your-parents bandwagon when books started to be written or therapy identifying every “buried” infliction from your past being the cause of your present demise.

Perhaps this is one reason why I have clung so tightly to God. Because I started out with something important missing in my new life. Even though I was too young to wrap my mind around it, the bonding to what is supposed to be did not happen. A part of me did not grow properly.

Abandonment and rejection was imprinted upon my heart whether I wanted it or not.

Nothing is 100% in this life and we all have our stories that have crippled us. So we tend to look for something .. someone .. to fill that emptiness.

I can tell you assuredly, God is who we need.

The Bible says God executes justice for the orphan.

It says God is a father to the fatherless.

It says when our father and mother abandons me the Lord will take me. Another translation says God will hold me close.

These are comforting scriptures revealing the father heart of God. Unfortunately, our first inclination may be to say, “If he loves me like a father, how come he let this happen and that happen?”

One day we will understand. Can you trust God the way we were made to trust our earthly father?

Today, don’t let the hurt consume you. Is is real. It is not visible like a broken arm but God sees it.

I can tell you this: everyone can call God their Heavenly Father, but few know him as Daddy.



Photo credit: CamillaLindskoug via Remodel Blog / CC BY-NC

teach your children well.

teach your children well.

When you have children, you are sure to experience heart ache.

They will grow and make their own decisions. This is how it’s supposed to be.

But some of those decisions will not be good, bringing heartache to their mother and/or father.

I’ve been thinking a lot about this lately in terms of how God must feel when we do not make good decisions.

Jesus said: “Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him?”

God is a father, too.

When my child does something wrong, it hurts me.

When we do something wrong, I think it hurts our Heavenly Father.

The Psalmist says, I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.

I don’t believe the Psalmist said that because he was afraid but because he loved God and did not want to be hurtful toward his Heavenly Father.

As parents, we invest so much into our children. There are sacrifices made because we love them so much. We teach them well.

God invested in us, too. He sacrificed a slow, painful death for the sin of all mankind. He left us the bible to teach us well.

To knowingly and willfully to go against God, to sin, is like throwing what God did for us in his face.

Like how our child can hurt us.

But God is also patient and enduring. He waits way longer than we would ever think of waiting for things to turn around.

Can you? Your patience will continue to teach your children well.

God will help you.

God will help them.

You, who are on the road
Must have a code that you can live by
And so, become yourself
Because the past is just a goodbye

Teach your children well
Their father’s hell did slowly go by
And feed them on your dreams
The one they picks, the one you’ll know by

Don’t you ever ask them why
If they told you, you would cry
So just look at them and sigh
And know they love you

And you of tender years
Can’t know the fears that your elders grew by
And so, please help them with your youth
They seek the truth before they can die

Teach your parents well
Their children’s hell will slowly go by
And feed them on your dreams
The one they picks, the one you’ll know by

Don’t you ever ask them why
If they told you, you will cry
So just look at them and sigh
And know they love you.

“Teach Your Children Well”
Graham Nash, May 1970



Photo credit: Dietmar Temps via Foter.com / CC BY-NC-SA






Lots of people have trouble with God.

That’s because he is called Heavenly Father.  Immediately, our experiences with our earthly father (or lack of) comes into play.

Whether your experience has been good or bad, can we agree that a good father will pick up his crying child and comfort him or her? Won’t he be protective? Available to listen to you? Play with you?

Love you?

You may not have had that. But that doesn’t change who God is.

father-and-son-1-1_lBut then, the questions come.

If God is so good, if he cares, then why did he let me have a horrible father? Or no father?

We all have struggles in this world. But you have a choice to believe … or not believe.

Though my father and mother forsake me, the LORD will receive me.

– The Bible


Photo Credit: Gilzee / Foter / CC BY-NC-ND

new year.

new year.

I’m not going to tell you this year will be better.

It  might not be.

But I can tell you that you are not alone as you face a new year.

The Bible says this:

Never will I leave you;

never will I forsake you.

So we say with confidence,

The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.

What can man do to me?

When we’re faced with trouble, sadness, disappointment – no matter what it is – we can be sure God is with us.

I know this to be positively true. The darkest time in my life was when I lost my son at age 24. They say losing a child is the worst thing.

It is.

You have to believe in someone bigger than yourself.


And when you do, there are surprises along the way – like love notes just for you – from your Heavenly Father.

Photo Courtesy: visualpanic / Foter / CC BY



Sometimes we think the pain is our fault.

Sometimes people tell us it’s our fault.

Then we have more pain.

Let me tell you what God says.

You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book. Psalm 56:8

God calls Himself the Heavenly Father.


That may bring more pain if you didn’t have a father, your father was cruel, or your father was absent. Nevertheless, God is a good father.

There is pain in life. It’s just the way it is. God never promised there wouldn’t be pain. He promised that He would be with us in the pain.

God knows every awkward moment, embarrassment, and frustration.

When you were abandoned, rejected, mocked, and hated.

And when you were afraid, sick, neglected, and abused.

Each time your heart was broken … he counted your tears.

That, is a good Father.

it works.

it works.

If you are a parent, you know how difficult it is when your child is sick. A sudden fever in the middle of the night or a broken arm from a fall – we want to take the pain away. We do all we can to comfort and help our child get well.

God is a parent, too. He is the Heavenly Father.  He is not distant from you. The Bible tells us God knows how many hairs are on your head. That tells me He is fully aware of you in a very personal way. When you are in pain, He also wants to bring comfort and help you get well.

A child learns to trust his parent’s care. God wants us to trust His care.

How does God comfort? First of all, it’s incredible to me what people can endure. Some call it the resilience of the human spirit. It’s there because God put it there. Secondly, if we want God’s involvement, we will find many comforting promises that will help us through our pain.

God has made us to work well within His design. That said, knowing those comforting promises help us with pain. It works. Just like a child trusts that an earthly parent will bring them a warm blanket, a glass of juice, a dosage of medicine, we can trust that our Heavenly Father promises never to leave us or forget us.

It doesn’t always feel like that. I know. But only when we see beyond ourselves and reach for something bigger than our pain, will we begin feeling differently.

When no one else understands, God does. When no one else cares, God does.