I wrote a lot in those days. My family and I were grieving. This was written 5 months after the death of my oldest son.

I had to go back to another blogging site to find this particular post. To find it, I had to look through what I had written at the time. I could not read through the entries. My body tensed up just scanning the titles.

This entry was particularly significant. It was true then and it’s true now. It encapsulates all that a Christian discovers when their heart is shattered. They see in a different way because they are on a new path with unfamiliar scenery. And for the very first time, they feel the presence of God in a way never felt before.

If God is always doing a “new thing”, maybe we should start by sitting at the feet of shattered, suffering Christians and ask them “what do you see?”

February 23rd, 2006, 07:33 am

on this side of the throne.

Behold the Father who sits on the throne and the Son at His right hand.

Had I not traveled this path, I would not be seeing this side of His throne. I would not have seen the reflection of His glory on this side of His face. I would have been unaware of the way His right hand moved toward me to take hold of mine. I would not have noticed the way His smile looked in this kind of light. I would not have seen the tear that dropped from his left eye as He gazed into my heart.

I would not have felt the warmth of His presence from where I was …

… on this side of the throne.