“Sociologists and anthropologists have analyzed and compared the various ways that cultures train its members for grief, pain, and loss. And when this comparison is done, it is often that our own contemporary secular, Western culture is one of the weakest and worst in history at doing so.”

Walking with God through Pain and Suffering – Timothy Keller

When you’ve felt the deepest sorrow in the world, you want answers.

There are times when we won’t get all the answers.

But the statement above gave me a good answer. Because we often wonder why we feel so isolated from others when we are suffering; particularly in the death of a child.

Americans aren’t always right. Sometimes we think we are in how we view things.

Our culture is all about rising above it, staying the course, being victorious.

Thing is, putting this first, without allowing the process of grieving, those things only hinder. The grieving condition is denied when the griever is expected to put a smile on their face and get back in the saddle of life again, looking the part everyone wants them to play.

The American way. 

Except, God is not an American.

The depth of sorrow we feel will be the depth of answers we need.

We won’t get all the answers. But at least we will get some. And I believe God gives us those answers along the way when we need them.

It doesn’t fix it, but it validates the pain.