Psalm 1 – when it hurts

I’m not going to say we will get through this together. Although we will.

I’m not going to say just trust God. Although we should.

I’m not going to give you tips, memes, or anything else to distract you from the truth.

Truth is a principle. In other words, whether you believe in a certain truth about a certain something, it doesn’t change the fact that it is true.

Truth is as sure as the law of gravity. Try to defy it, and maybe you can, but ultimately, like the law of gravity, truth will prevail.

Truth sets us free from wrong or misdirected thinking.

The reason we often get either angry at God or become completely disillusioned is because we are not accepting the truth.

Lead me by your truth and teach me, for you are the God who saves me. All day long I put my hope in you.

Our lives are interrupted by the pandemic of Covid-19.

We are all affected. Some worse than others.

The truth is: it hurts.

It is not enough to be positive.

It is not enough to be optimistic.

That may suffice for a day or two. But then you are back to square 1 of feeling the pain.

Whatever emotions you are experiencing, there is only one way to anchor yourself.

Think of a tree. In fact, Psalm 1 uses a tree as an example in terms of those who trust God:

…but whose delight is in the law of the Lord,
and who meditates on his law day and night.

That person is like a tree planted by streams of water,
which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither and
whatever they do prospers.

Some Christians would define “prosper” as monetary. That a miracle is waiting for you.

That happens sometimes.

Yet, I have discovered the times I was waiting for something tangible to get me out of the problem and make me feel better, make me “prosper” the way I wanted, God was developing something unseen inside of me that would prosper me.

I had to accept it.

I had to trust him.

Or not.

Just like the roots of a tree which are unseen, we can become anchored to something unseen. No matter the wind, the blight, the drought, or any storm, you can stand strong.

That doesn’t mean you aren’t going to feel the effects of the wind, the blight, the drought, or the storm.

It just won’t consume you. That is prospering.

God doesn’t always remedy a situation the way we want.

Difficult situations often do not turn out the way we thought, planned, or prayed.

For every person who receives an answer to prayer, perhaps there are 50+ people who do not.

But he will give us peace, comfort, and strength to manage.

Truth exists from a source beyond our human capabilities.

Truth, and where we find it, is what will sustain us.

nature forest trees park — Photo by veeterzy on Pexels.com

The true victims of suicide – the family – are often victimized again through the words and actions of others.

It is often said, “Well, people don’t know what to say.” and the family is supposed to have more understanding for these people than expecting understanding from them.

If they don’t know what to say, why don’t they just not say anything?

And why does the family have to accept that they say the wrong thing?

Ironically, the grieving family often does accept it. They are hurting so badly that what difference does more hurt make?

Just know this: if the grieving family does receive hurt from others, they will simply and quietly distance themselves. And then, be prepared. Because more comments will come!

What is the solution?

Suicide is frightening. I get that people mostly run from it. I get it is awkward.

But what is wrong with people who cannot imagine the horrific pain the family and/or friends are experiencing…enough to not talk about them behind their backs?

If you are one who has experienced this, know this:

God says he is near the broken-hearted. You may not think he is, but he is. He knows all the specifics. When you know this, you can walk through life with your heart protected from the painful words and judgments from others. “What’s wrong with him?” “She is not the same.”

You think?

And maybe he/she is “not the same” because of what you have said?

Comments such as this are so absurd, you finally reach the point realizing people like this are more than clueless. They are self-absorbed and ignorant to the feelings of others.

Continue to walk through these situations, knowing God is your defender. Be patient. It will take time, but I promise – you will come through it strong, peaceful, and even joyful. That is because God becomes real to you and you trust him, knowing one day you will see your loved one again.

Such wonderful hope!

When you lose a child to suicide, or anyone for that matter, the pain will always be there, but it won’t consume you.

Don’t allow yourself to become bitter with people. It will consume you and make you miserable. Move on and leave them behind if necessary. Kindly, of course.

tree by water

When you believe God, you are like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither– whatever they do prospers. Psalm 1

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photo credit: Mark Pouley via Foter.com / CC BY-NC-ND