Tag Archive | divorce

angry at God.

Anger is a normal reaction to pain.

Betrayal.

Failure.

Loss.

Abuse.

Divorce.

Grieving.

Rejection.

Depression.

Unkindness.

Illness.

Pain affects us mentally, emotionally, and physically.

So why are we angry?

Mostly because we ask why me? Why does God allow pain?

We are not going to fully understand why and to stay angry will only hurt more.

There comes a point when we have to make peace with the fact we live with pain.

Shaking our fist at God should not last forever. Because he knows there will be pain and gives us numerous words of comfort.

Here’s one:

The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed.

When no one else gets it, God does. He says he is close to us when we’re hurting.

The only way to stop being angry is to accept and believe.

When you do, watch what happens. Because the same God who has allowed pain in this world, is the same one who is near to us.

You don’t believe in God?

Then who are you angry with?

Let God help you.

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jenny downing via Foter.com / CC BY

anxious.

letterAI don’t know about you, but I think there are plenty of reasons these days to be anxious.

On the global scene, terrorism and dictators with their nuclear interests/intentions is a daily concern. Nothing is new under the sun but access to 24 hour news channels and the internet bring us face to face with real-time events.

Personally, we may be dealing with relational issues in our family or workplace, financial struggles, illness, divorce, and the death of a loved one.

The list of seemingly lesser anxieties which are often hidden in our heart may be about the future. Will I pass the exam? Am I a good parent? Who will take care of me when I’m old? The “what-ifs”.

When we feel like we’re drowning in circumstances that make us anxious, we need guidance and an anchor to hold us securely.

Consider this scripture:

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Peace.

Isn’t that what we really want when we’re anxious? Because we can’t always change our situations.

You begin with trusting. We all trust in something and primarily, we rely on ourselves. But some things in life are way beyond what we can handle.

When you trust God with difficult situations, you will have peace – the remedy for anxiousness.

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Photo credit: kudumomo / Foter / CC BY

revisiting grief.

Holidays, particularly during Christmas, are difficult times for people who are grieving the loss of a loved one.

For the next two weeks, I am going to re-post previous entries I’ve written on grief.

Perhaps grief is the most misunderstood emotion. The person grieving a deep loss, whether through death, divorce, or personal disappointments or failure, needs to be patient with themselves. But mostly, the people around them need to be patient.

If you know someone who needs to understand your grieving, consider sharing with them the next two weeks.

Jun17

How do I deal with grief?

We live in a world of instant gratification.

Even the poorest among us has access to a fast food lunch, a cell phone, and/or cable television.

The problem is not all things in life can be instantly gratified. Grief is one of those things.

We want to push it away for another day. We’ve got things to do and places to go. But grief interrupts our rhythm.

The world has advanced in leaps and bounds, but our soul hasn’t. We may adjust and accommodate  and even welcome the intrusions of someone’s random thoughts posted on a social website. Yet, our soul is the bedrock of who we are and it is limited. Without recognizing those limitations we expect more than we were made to handle.

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There has to be times of calmness. We were not made to be constantly alert.

Grieving the loss of someone cannot be filed with the rest of your daily activities. It won’t allow it. Grief will demand your attention and the more you try to keep at bay the more it will intrude. Ignoring it is like ignoring a bullet wound.

You can’t.

Next post: How?

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Photo Credit: Roozbeh Rokni / Foter / CC BY-NC-ND

 

grief.

Grief doesn’t only come from death. It comes from all kinds of loss that brings deep pain. Divorce, illness, abuse, failure … all are reasons we grieve. People need time to grieve and the best thing we can do is give them all the time they need.

After the death of my son, I learned that grief was not a straight shot but like a spiral staircase. In other words, each day is not better and better until you reach the goal of “new normal”. It is more like some good days, a bad day or two, more good days, and bad again. It’s like going up a staircase and then going back a few steps. This is the healthy way to grieve. If you rush it too much, it seems as if sadness gets buried and comes out later in unsuspecting ways.

Don’t be afraid to grieve. It is a natural process that takes time. Our culture is so productive and goal oriented, we expect too much from ourselves and others. Take the time to go through the process of grief. You will be better off in the end than if you rushed yourself along.

The sun will shine again. I promise!